The following songs recount UNITY’s journey from animal to animal, training for the Abbess’s prophecy.

Fly Like an Eagle The Steve Miller Band Talk like an eagle Hold the stick Talk like an eagle It’s just bitch-assed politics Don’t wanna talk like an eagle Gonna kick Please, barf me out now So a new host I can pick Not the goat, ’cause That pre-nup’s nothing but a trap Not the pika That mortgage had no interest cap Not the eagle He never shuts his freakin’ yap No more birds or beasts This “wildlife” stuff is crap UNITY’S slippin’… into more critters. Kay Gilbert (and Wayne) December 6, 2011	I am the Walrus The Beatles I am bird and I am beast and I am fish and all of them together! Thing to be done, this just isn’t fun, I’m kinda stunned … Don’t like it! Eagles must remember … When to use the talking stick! Stupid regulations, ev’ry critter has ‘em, Abbess says to learn them all, ’cause I’m the Chosen One! In-o-cu-la-ted … Re-gur-gi-ta-ted … I am a virus! gloop gloop guh-gloop … eddurd December 6, 2011	Little Pink Houses John Mellencamp Said the mayor To the slayer, “Welcome to our town! Just pick out a spot, Like the one that you’ve got, And then start burrowing down!” Mortgage writing, Starts reciting A bunch of stupid rules! New kid says, “Don’cha know That this poncho will show Just what I can do to you fools!” Welcome to Pika Hill, Furry and brown! Welcome to Pika Hill, A Prolagus town! Welcome to Pika Hill, Making her frown …! Unity shows them she’s not falcon around! eddurd November 30, 2011
No Business Like Show Business Irving Berlin Annie Get Your Gun, 1946 There’s no garden gnomes No Fuller domes Not in Pika Hill First our mortgage papers will enslave you Then we box you in with CCRs Meh, you killed a falcon. That won’t save you Our condo board rules this place like czars You look like us At Prolagus But your smell gives me creeps You seem kind of funny, but it’s not a joke You clearly are not our kind of folk Not in your bandana and your falcon cloak You’re not one of our peeps Kay Gibert November 30, 2011 “I was every officer of my condo association at one point or another, sometimes all of them at once, and I share Unity’s disdain.” “Hey, omniv’rous construct zombie” to the tune of I’m the Urban Spaceman by Bonzo Dog Doo-Dah Band ( YouTube ) Filked by eddurd October 15, 2011	The Lonely Goatherd R. Rogers & O. Hammerstein The Sound of Music, 1959 High on a hill stands the lonely goat-girl Ah ha ha ha ah ha ha ha ah ha ha “Sproingk” went the eyes of the lonely goat-girl Ah ha ha ha ah ha ha ha ha She broke the wall and took off: she’s free now Ah ha ha ha ah ha ha ha ah ha ha She hasn’t noticed that she’s a he now     (I learned that female goats have horns -- wow!)     Ah ha ha ha ah ha ha ha ha O ho! She is one with wildlife O ho! Fits the prophecy O ho! Dr. Lee’s the midwife Of the Chosen Notary She’s heavy metal, she always throws horns Ah ha ha ha ah ha ha ha ah ha ha Lee drained her blood, as a goat she’s reborn Ah ha ha ha ah ha ha ha ha O ho! Nanites in the bloodstream O ho! That is U.N.I.T.Y. O ho! Living out her best dream High above the Owyhee Goats have it made, no more rules, just volition No “blueberry waffles” from that Doctor bitch Also, no thumbs placed in opposition Just a sec . . . there seems to be a hitch Want a slushy (Want a slushy) Want a slushy (Want a slushy) Want a slushy-ee (Want a slushy-y) Want a slushy (Want a slushy) I can’t wield the Magic Seal Hooves are my Achilles heel Goathood isn’t so ideal And Virginia Lee dealt me a real raw deal (hey!) Kay Gilbert November 17, 2011	Spiderman Theme Paul Francis Webster & Robert "Bob" Harris Goatygal, Goatygal, Does whatever she damn well shall, Runs around, shouting loud Headbutts wall, oh so proud Look Out! Here comes the Goatygal. Is she sane? Listen, bud Her mind’s stored within almost-blood. Can she chew through tin cans? Where the hell is my pan? Oh god! There goes the Goatygal. In the heart of the wood At the scene of boo-boos She attempts to look good As she chews up the clues! Goatygal, Goatygal Deadly, funloving Goatygal Sense and plans She ignores Sanity’s such a bore To her, life’s something that’s fun to smash, So if you hear a big crash… Run from the Goatygal! Katrika November 16, 2011

Eventually, UNITY combines with Dr. Lee. The life-long reserve, caution, and indecision of Dr. Lee combines potently with UNITY’s impulsiveness…

I Will Survive Freddie Perrin & Dino Fekaris At first I was afraid, I was petrified Kept thinking I’d make a mistake, so I could not decide But now I have black nanite goo coursing through every part of me It’s Unity --- and now I suddenly feel free So, hot damn! Life was a sham I hesitated, but now, I’ll be a batt’ring ram No longer shy and scared, nerd-girl Virginia Lee It’s the new me The woman I was meant to be Oh, hot damn! (Bridge) I overthought, was overwrought Now I can’t think about a thing but Superballs I’ve bought Give me a sammich and a slushy and I’m happy as a clam You’ll wanna be like me and she, once you see how secure I am I say, hot damn! From lamb to ram I’m Ginny Lee with Unity inside, and you can call me “Ma’am” Watch that robot army fall ‘Cause I’ll destroy them, one and all That’s who I am I say, hot damn! Oh, hot damn! Kay Gilbert December 30, 2011

Baba O’Reilly (“Teenage Wasteland”) The Who Had to scrub my dol, Couldn’t choose at all! Through my life, I’m always hesitating! Now I’ve been possessed! Never second-guessed! Thought turns into action, without waiting! Now I say, “Hot damn” … Two-in-one, I am! I feel both intellect and meanness! I don’t feel alarm … Bandage on my arm, Shows how Unity got intravenous! I.V. … Went into me, And not a turkey baster! Now I just can’t wait! I won’t hesitate! All my opponents will be wasted! I will teach them fear With this utensil here! Soon all those turkeys will get basted! (They’re all basted!) eddurd December 30, 2011

Take Me Out To The Ball Game Jack Norworth & Albert Von Tilzer This traditional dol game Happened when I was one! Put at a table with lots of things; What I choose, then my future life brings! But I asked my folks for a moment … (My Mom gave Dad all the blame!) For a one- … year- … old, it’s too much! It’s the old dol game! eddurd December 29, 2011

OK, let’s review our characters' motivations: Unity, Dr Lee, and the captive Anasigma advance scouts

Octopus’s Garden The Beatles I want to be … a notary! I’m a silly super-soldier, with a stamp! I’ll join the guys … who notarize, As a silly super-soldier, with a stamp! I will jump and shout with glee When ordered to … the Armory! Poor Dr. Lee … cannot get free From a silly super-soldier, with a stamp! Now why don’t you … go rendezvous With the team that was supposed to be here first? I didn’t meet … nor did I eat … With your team, so you had best assume the worst! Lost somewhere in Idaho … Now ‘scuse me, Doc … I gotta go! I’m gonna be … a notary, And a silly super-soldier! That’s me! eddurd October 26, 2011

The Sound of Silence Simon & Garfunkel Rational Virginia Lee Doesn’t fall for “prophecy” But she could show them, if they’re willing, How Unity could be fulfilling The requirement, “Be one with beast and bird” Just say the word, She’ll show them how … with SCIENCE! She’ll fit the dream to Unity She’ll use her rationality! It’s done with logic and precision, Not mumbo-jumbo mysticism! Her creation … she will soon exsanguinate, Ain’t that great? She’ll do it now … with SCIENCE! She doesn’t know why she was sent, But now she’s in her element! And her plan she is disclosing As triumphantly she’s posing! And to finish, she lets out an evil laugh And a half! Just listen … that’s the sound … of SCIENCE. eddurd November 9, 2011

A Holly Jolly Christmas Johnny Marks Have the naughty hottie hit me! I’m afraid that I’ve been bad! Jones, my dear, please spank my rear, And crank it up a tad! Have the naughty hottie hit me, And get out the whips and chains! It’s so fine when we combine The pleasures with the pains! Oh, oh, from head to toe, Tigerlily’s mean! It’s neat to kiss her feet! As you wish, my queen! Have the naughty hottie hit me As I grovel on the floor … Swat my bottie, I’m so naughty! Hottie, hit me! Once more! eddurd December 20, 2011

Time to fight encroaching Robot Army of mad Tigerlilly Jones !

Paint It Black The Rolling Stones There’s Tigerlily Jones, I knew that she’d be back! She’s there upon her throne; her Power, it is Black! Amid the ice and snow, up in the frozen north, She’s built a robot army, ready to spring forth! How groovy, Dr. Jones is beautiful and black! Her wind-up robots are preparing to attack! When she unleashes all her spring-pow’red funkitude, Notary public monks are well and truly screwed! She tells her flunky, “Little man, you’ll get a smack … My power is not ‘dark’, it’s pure and simple ‘black’!” Beware the afro, and the platforms on her feet! Her troops go marching to a funky disco beat! Don’t give her any flack! She’s ready to attack! Won’t cut you any slack! Her power, it is black! mwa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha hot damn! mwa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha hot damn! mwa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha hot damn … eddurd October 28, 2011

Frosty the Snowman Walter “Jack” Rollins & Steve Nelson Jones-y the Madgirl Told her army to prepare! She’s a disco queen With her flare-leg jeans And her afro-tastic hair! Notary Cheiftain Came and hollered, “Not so fast! I have funkitude! Now your pooch is screwed! It is showdown time, at last!” Is Tigerlily Just a silly Eighties poser fool? Or does her mighty pimpstick give Her the pow’r of funk and cool? Jones and the Abbess Now will battle royale-ly! Can the One True Funk Turn the ‘bots to junk? We’ll just have to wait and see! eddurd December 24, 2011

Bonus: Robot-themed door-sign

Meta-Songs!

A Policeman’s Lot is Not a Happy One W. S. Gilbert & A. Sullivan Pirates of Penzance When a writer is in deep collaboration With an artist, as they make peculiar plans, It’s the writer who’s assailed by aggravation That he can’t sell random scribbles to his fans! When an artist makes a doodle, he or she may Sell it simply without effort, without strife! You can’t sell a writer’s random notes on eBay … We lament the writer’s lousy lot in life! Ah, poor Jeffrey’s world with misery is rife (oh so rife), He laments the writer’s lousy lot in life! eddurd October 2, 2011 Jeffrey Channing Wells is the co-creator of Skin Horse. Visit his blog at Flight Recordings for more of his writings.

“A Song Supposedly About Skin Horse” Bad Horse Chorus Jed Whedon & Joss Whedon Dr. Horrible’s Sing Along Blog Skin Horse, Skin Horse Skin Horse, Skin Horse Skin Horse is a webcomic It’s guesting at this con I don’t know much about it but I wrote this song And I have just helped sing in a Skin Horse singalong And when Arisia’s run its course I think I should go read Skin Horse Skin Horse, Skin Horse Skin Horse, Skin Horse I wrote this on the way here There’s no time to rehearse I’m not sure that it even needs a second verse I think I’d better end it before this gets much worse Apologies go to my source Which was supposedly: Skin Horse Nat Budin January 2011 Shaenon Garrity, the co-creator of Skin Horse was Webcomics Guest of Honor at Arisia 2011. Nat let himself be roped into co-leading the first Arisia Skin Horse Sing-Along, despite never having read the comic. That experience inspired this song.

You, too, have just helped sing in a Skin Horse singalong!  Thank you!

To read the comic’s recent archives go to www.skin-horse.com

(for older archives, www.webcomicsnation.com/shaenongarrity/skinhorse )

This storyline is named “Once and Future”.

Also, check out the webpage of prolific filker, Ed Gedeon (eddurd), at www.webcomicsnation.com/eddurd/everydayheroes