Fruitless: Solution

By Sarah Bagby and Ben Monreal

Answer: SCHOONER

The story mentions a number of English desserts—some common, some obscure, but all normally made with fruit. Here, not so much. The desserts are modified by the only adjectives in the text, all unappetizing. Alphabetize by dessert (“I only came here to ORDER DESSERT”) and read off the first letters of the unappetizing adjectives

s smug betty
c crooked buckle
h hapless cobbler
o officious fool
o odd grunt
n nervous slump
e execrable sponge
r reprehensible tart

to get SCHOONER.

Acceptance Letter to MIT	Anger Management Book	Architect’s Compass	Bargaining Chips	Broken Twig	Burnt Sulfur Lugnut	Cardiac Devices	Denial of Service Attack Plan
Depression-Era Clothing	Domestic Avocado	Faded Sofa	Fancy Pocketwatch	Harlequin Doll	Iron Shovels	Leviticus Single	Lil’ String Bikini
Little Statue of Liberty	Lottery Numbers	Madman’s Jackal Mask	Mint-Flavored Salami	Mississippi Collectible	Nebular Gloves	Neural Blade	Officer’s Truncheons
Old Deuteronomy Sheet Music	Polyatomic Robot	Red Pinafore	Sega Genesis	Severe Beret	Shield of Judgment	Sienna Notebook	Soldierly Parasol
Sparkling Necklace	Super-Accurate Tri-Square	Tacky Jeweled Helm	Tamil Liqueur	Ultima III: Exodus	Ultrasonic Boots	Unsafe Mtorolite	Worn Loop of Gold
Printable Inventory