Author: Dan Katz
This puzzle involves both the logic puzzle trademarked in the US as KenKen (known in the public domain as calcudoku or occasionally TomTom) and professional wrestling. Ken Kennedy, a former WWE wrestler, provides the link between these concepts but is otherwise irrelevant to the puzzle.
Each of the "Let me tell you something" snippets is an imagined interview with a pro wrestler building up their match at the pay-per-view event SummerSlam. There have been twenty-six SummerSlam events as of January 2014, and each snippet is from a different event, creating a correspondence between the numbers from 1 to 26 and the letters of the alphabet.
When each capital letter in a puzzle grid is replaced by its corresponding number, the grids become uniquely solvable. The rules are that each row and column must contain the digits 1 to 6, and in each "cage," applying the given mathematical operation should result in the given number. (Note that in a cage with more than three blocks, subtraction and division are cumulative; the larger number is divided by or reduced by all the smaller numbers in turn. Also, the lowercase letters are ignored while solving.) The solutions are below:
Once the grids are solved, each lowercase-letter square has a number in it, as follows:
These numbers can be inserted into the sums at the bottom of the puzzle. They yield numbers between 1 and 26 that can then be converted into capital letters using the code above to spell CUT PROMO AT HQ.
In pro wrestling lingo, to "cut a promo" means to give an interview hyping up a future match (as in the interview segments in this puzzle). Teams must call HQ and make an appointment to cut their own promo; when we do so, they are given the puzzle answer. [Note: This puzzle was written as a backup, so it is designed to replace any puzzle as necessary, since any answer can be given to the team after they cut a promo.]