1-1=2
Solution
By Ann
Jones
Each
limerick can be solved for a pair of words that are a single letter
deletion.
The
number above each limerick is the number of characters in the longer
string.
Order
limericks by deleted letter. Read down
the first letter of each limerick.
Follow
instructions.
CAESARSHIFTLHENMBHGBLAUHFU
This
string yields only one coherent answer phrase.
It
gives 'Solution is hbomb' (caesar shift by 7)
(6)
c(a)ries C Children should brush every night
To avoid the most
terrible plight.
A mouth full of ONE
"Will hurt, ere
it's done."
Your TWO won't be sounds
of delight!
(9)
cele(b)rity A "Any bozo can shine
for a minute of fame,"
"Or fifteen, if he
quickly exploits his own name."
"But to be a true
ONE,"
"When it's over and
done,"
Means you don't fall
with TWO from the top of your game.
(8)
pre(c)lude E Even a gallant romance doesn't ONE
That he's just out for
sexual fun.
A kiss is a TWO
"To what else he
might do,"
"So be careful when
dating him, hon."
(5)
mi(d)st S "She stands in the ONE of the
TWO,"
"Awaiting her
lover, so true."
The fog holds him back;
He's soon lost the
track.
"She waits, growing
ever more blue."
(8)
Pyren(e)es A Along the ONE hiked a man and a dame
To the Gulf of Lion they
finally came
So many ships there
Burning coal in the air
That the odor of TWO
made them lame.
(7)
per(f)use R "Rushing throughout, the drug ONEd my
soul"
"Spread all inside
me, until I was whole"
Then I TWOd the label
At first glance twas
babel
Then I learned it was
naught more than Skoal
(8)
brid(g)e S She stood on the ONE o'er the river
Her heart and her soul
were aquiver
A TWO she would be
When church bells struck
three
The thought up her spine
sent a shiver
(4)
c(h)at H How does a guy find a pet?
He starts up a ONE on the net
"For
""pussy"" he asks"
(As he multitasks)
"And, lo, it's a
TWO that he'll get!"
(5)
lam(i)a I "In the dark of the night the ONE
struck,"
But her evil would not
bring her luck.
For the TWO that she bit
Was more spiritually
fit.
"He said
""Om"" and then she could not suck."
(6)
in(j)ure F For a video game to be cool
It seems mayhem is often
the rule.
"But to ONE, maim
and kill"
"Doesn't take any
skill,"
And
it TWOs you to violence in school.
(6)
mon(k)ey T "The man and his ONE simply want to be
free,"
"Swinging and
clambering, from tree to tree."
But what can they do?
They have to have TWO;
To get in the jungle
they must pay a fee.
(6)
alle(l)e L Lou and Leigh spoke of kids as they
strolled
Down the TWO line with
trees great and old.
"Fam'ly dreams
aren't exotic,"
But their failures
zygotic
(Deficient ONEs) would
leave all their hopes cold.
(8)
there(m)in H Hearing the Beach Boys is always a joy.
"'Good Vibrations'
I've worshipped since I was a boy."
And TWO is the source
"Of my rev'rence,
of course:"
That band made the ONE
sound like more than a toy.
(6)
a(n)gora E "Ecuador, Turkey, and Greece are the
best"
For shopping and buying
without any rest.
In one TWO I bought
The ONE that I sought
To knit a fine sweater
to wear on my chest.
(7)
cor(o)net N Nine kings wore the ONE on their brow.
"Six queens, too --
the pope had a cow."
Each time that it's
passed
There sounds a TWO blast
And all the court must
kneel with a bow.
(6)
(p)ledge M "My darling, from that TWO please back
up.
Please see reason, doll,
come down and sup!
I do ONE to you
I'll always be true
Now get down here and
fill up my cup.”
(6)
(Q)uinta B Bear River flows with a roar and a crash
"From the TWO
Mountains, making its way with a splash.
If you visit there,
I tell you,
beware."
The La ONE in Midvale
accepts only cash.
(7)
chanc(r)e H "Hey, if you're wary, examine my lap."
Said the naked and randy
young chap.
"What's the TWO,
now, that I,"
Just a regular
guy,"
Have
a ONE that reveals I've the clap?"
(7)
ver(s)ify G Good solvers will soon want to TWO
An answer by calling HQ.
"But first, please
decode"
By reading this load
Of prose we did ONE just
for you.
(6)
bow(t)ie B "Blast that Paul Simon, a ONE on for
fun,"
A down-homish look that
most snazzy folks shun.
He would have been scary
(Instead of so merry)
If he'd carried a TWO
knife or gun.
(6)
d(u)ress L "Laugh all you want, he's a
beauty:"
"Chris Morse in a TWO, what a
cutie!"
"He's not under
ONE,"
He's just having fun.
(His Dorothy was better
than Judy.)
(5)
le(v)er A "A lecherous man makes a play,"
A TWO on his face --
hear him say:
"Hey, sweet honey
bun,
Please pull on my ONE!
Hit the jackpot and
you'll make my day!"
(7)
s(w)immer U "Use lotion when out having fun,"
Or you'll burn from too
long in the sun.
"You'll TWO in the
heat,"
"From your head to
your feet,"
Be you surfer or sailor
or ONE.
(6)
se(x)ism H "He says that he loves me, he thinks
we can groove."
"""No
other broad makes me so feel the earth move."""
"I say,
""That's no TWO --"
"It was all about
you."""
It's his ONE that I
don't think will ever improve.
(6)
g(y)rate F Franny can ONE like the best of the bunch.
She twirls and she purrs
as the men eat their lunch.
"But the music they
play,"
By the end of the day
"Will TWO on your
ears, like the too-sweet "fruit punch"."
(7)
c(z)arina U "Using oars, Catherine rowed down the
Dneiper."
The villagers came out
to greet her.
Their love was so true
The ONE got a tattoo
"A keel-shaped TWO,
right by her peeper."