Date: Thu, 17 Dec 1998 09:39:31 -0500 From: "the rags of time..." Subject: [WRITERS] EXERCISE: Home for the Holidays? Some of you may be slipping off to family or friends for the holidays, others may be disappearing to far parts of the world to avoid family or friends, and many of us are probably sitting at home, sighing over the things that we would do if we could... No matter what, you're likely to find yourself in a party. One of those gatherings of people, known or unknown, with some food, some liquid, other accouterments (I hope that word means what I think it does), and probably more sound than you normally encounter all day (especially after enough time passes and people gather, there often is a sharp spike in the noise level). Instead of just huddling in the corner wondering how you get yourself into these things, try looking around and answering these three questions: 1. Pick a person -- even the boring person who is telling you their life story -- and imagine telling someone else about this person, with exactly the right details so that they would he immediately identify the person if they ever met. What about this person identifies them, sets them apart from all the other people like them? And how do you tell someone about the little dimple in the person's cheek that looks just like a "J" when they smile, or the funny way that they lean their drink from side to side as they walk without ever quite spilling? Fair warning: paying attention to someone often makes them interesting... 2. Watch someone who is telling a joke or a story. Think about what their choice of topic, their presentation, their facial tics and blinks, their reaction to interruptions, and all that shows you about them. Notice how they pay attention to their audience, and how they work with the audience. You might even want to make a few notes about the good points and the bad points of their presentation. Fair warning: most people don't expect a critique at a party... 3. A consultant we work with recently commented that he really likes to see his clients in big parties. When I looked puzzled, he expanded on the point by saying he likes to watch "the mill" to see who talks to whom, and who is left mumbling in the corner, etc. If you're at a large party, keep an eye on the patterns of interaction. Think about how you might describe three characters, one that everyone seems to want to get close to, one who is trying to get close to someone else, and perhaps the person standing against the wall wondering just what they are doing here... So instead of wondering what you are doing at the party, pay close attention to what the other people are doing at the party. Who knows, you might even start wanting to go to parties! [Bonus points for people who try these out and then write up some of their observations!] "The friends that have it I do wrong When ever I remake a song Should know what issue is at stake, It is myself that I remake." William Butler Yeats tink