Date: Wed, 5 Jan 2000 10:02:01 -0500 (EST) You might be an engineer: * if the only jokes you receive are through e-mail... * if you window shop ast Radio Shack... * if the thought that a CD might refer to finance or to music never entered your mind... * if you still own a slide rule AND you know how to use it... * if you own one or more white short-sleeve dress shirts... * if you know the direction water swirls when you flush... * if you avoid doing anything because you don't wish to contribute to the eventual heat-death of the universe * if when your Professor asks where your homework is, you claim to have accidentally determined its momentu so precisely that, according to Heisenberg , it could be ANYWHERE in the Universe * you would assume a "horse" to be a "sphere" in order to make the math easier * if your IQ number is greater than your weight... * if you can type 70 words a minute but can't read your own handwriting... * if you spend more on your home computer than your car... * if you have a neatly sorted set of old nuts and bolts in your garage (or, in my case, old files and cookbooks)... * if Dilbert is your hero... * if you can remember seven computer passwords but not your anniversary... * if you have ever owned a calculator with no "equal" key and you know what the term "RPN" stands for ... * if your wife hasn't the foggiest idea what you do at work... * if you have more friends on the 'net than in real life... * if you can't remember where you parked your car for the 3rd time this week... * if you have memorized the program schedule for the Discovery Channel and have seen most of the shows already... * if you think that when people around you yawn, they just didn't get enough sleep... * if you carry on a one hour debate over the results of a five minute test... * if you want a 24X CD ROM for Xmas... * you can mathematically prove that the World Series actually converges * if it is sunny and 70ºF out, and you are working at the computer * if you have no life..., and you can PROVE it mathematically * If you chuckle every time someone says "centrifugal force" * if you can do vector calculus but can't remember how to do long division * if you hesitate to look at something because you don't want to break down its wave function * if the Humane Society brought charges against you because you ACTUALLY performed The Schrodinger Cat experiment * If your spouse sends you an e-mail insted of calling you to dinner... AND it goes without saying, at Christmas time you will be the one to find the burned-out bulb in the string!