From: lmtancre@Athena.MIT.EDU Date: Fri, 10 Jan 92 14:17:10 EST BAKER HOUSE MALE PURITY TEST Score one point for each question answered "no." HAVE YOU EVER... 1. Experienced an erection? (If no, try the female test.) 2. Experienced an erection in the last three months? 3. Experienced an erection for more than one hour continuously? 4. Had a wet dream? 5. Had a date with a real live girl? 6. Had a date past 4:00 AM? 7. Had a date on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday of the same weekend? 8. Kissed a girl? 9. Kissed a girl in the last three months? 10. Kissed a girl while both of you were in a horizontal position? 11. Kissed a girl on the neck? 12. Kissed a girl on the first date? 13. French kissed a girl? 14. Nibbled on a girl's earlobe? 15. Danced with a girl? 16. Danced with a girl cheek to cheek? 17. Experienced an erection while dancing with a girl? 18. Had an ejaculation while dancing with a girl? 19. Necked continuously for more than fifteen minutes? 20. Necked continuously for more than two hours? 21. Pinched or patted a girl's buttocks? 22. Petted below the shoulders (not your own)? 23. Unfastened and removed a girl's bra? 24. Fondled the covered breast of a girl? 25. Fondled a girl's bare breast? 26. Done No. 25 in the last three months? 27. Done No. 25 with a girl who picked you up? 28. Done No. 25 with a girl who was unconscious or asleep? 29. Sucked the nipple of a human female subsequent to your weaning? 30. Done No. 29 in the last three months? 31. Put your hand under a girl's skirt? 32. Fingered and fondled a girl's vagina? 33. Done No. 32 in the last three months? 34. Done No. 32 on the first date with a girl? 35. Had your bare genitals fondled by a girl? 36. Had an ejaculation while petting or being petted? 37. Seen a completely nude woman in the flesh? 38. Undressed a girl completely? 39. Had a girl completely undress you? 40. Gone swimming with a nude girl? 41. Gone through the motions of sexual intercourse while fully dressed? 42. Been in bed since age fifteen with a woman who was not more than three years younger than yourself? 43. Told a girl you loved her when you did not? 44. Told meaningless promises of marriage in order to seduce a girl? 45. Fondled a girl less than 15 since you were 15? 46. Intentionally jostled a woman you have never seen before? 47. Discussed masturbation with a girl? 48. Masturbated in the last three months? 49. Masturbated at least once a week for the last three months? 50. Masturbated at least once a day for the last three months? 51. Told dirty jokes to, or been told by a girl? 52. Been arrested? 53. Read pornographic literature? 54. Seen a pornographic movie? 55. Seen a burlesque show? 56. Smoked a cigarette, cigar or pipe? 57. Had an alcoholic drink? 58. Puked due to excessive consumption of alcohol? 59. Passed out due to excessive consumption of alcohol? 60. Been propositioned by a homosexual or propositioned another man? 61. Had your bare genitals fondled by a man (other than your doctor)? 62. Fondled the genitals of a man yourself? 63. Been in a serious fight since you were fifteen? 64. Used illegal drugs? 65. Attempted to seduce a girl? 66. Attempted to rape a girl? 67. Ejaculated into a girl's mouth? 68. Performed cunnilingus? 69. ? 70. Had sexual intercourse? 71. Done No. 70 in the last three months? 72. Done No. 70 without a condom? 73. Done No. 70 with a virgin (not you)? 74. Done No. 70 during her menstruation? 75. Done No. 70 in a bed? 76. Done No. 70 in a car? 77. Done No. 70 in a dorm or a frat? 78. Done No. 70 dog fashion (from behind)? 79. Done No. 70 Greek fashion (anal intercourse)? 80. Done No. 70 sitting up? 81. Done No. 70 on the first date? 82. Done No. 70 with a girl who was asleep or unconscious? 83. Done No. 70 with a girl of a different race? 84. Done No. 70 with a prostitute? 85. Done No. 70 with more than one girl (not necessarily at the same time)? 86. Done No. 70 with more than five girls? 87. Done No. 70 with more than ten girls? 88. Done No. 70 with more than one girl on the same night? 89. Done No. 70 more than three times on the same night? 90. Done No. 70 more than ten times with one particular girl? 91. Ejaculated before an impending entry (messy, aren't you)? 92. Had venereal disease? 93. Been watched during intercourse by an impartial observer? 94. Caused a girl to become pregnant? 95. Committed statutory rape? 96. Committed forcible rape? 97. Committed zoophilia (screwed an animal)? 98. Committed adultery? 99. Committed incest? 100. Committed a felony other than those mentioned above (as if they weren't enough)?