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Section 6.11.1

Interrupted Sentence Structure

Placing a modifier between the subject and the verb or between the verb and the direct object can weaken the structure of the sentence and make the sentence difficult to interpret. In general, the longer and more complicated the modifier, the more it weakens the sentence. Although you can often get away with interrupting the structure of the sentence with a short (one-word) modifier, adding a longer modifier significantly worsens the sentence.


Weak

The heron, egret, and stork colonies in Everglades National Park that once each contained tens of thousands of birds whose bustling extravagance helped inspire the founding in 1905 of the National Association of Audubon Societies (later the National Audubon Society) have shrunk by 95 percent since the 1930s.

Improved

The bird colonies in Everglades National Park once each contained tens of thousands of birds whose bustling extravagance helped inspire the founding in 1905 of the National Association of Audubon Societies (later the National Audubon Society). These colonies of herons, egrets, and storks have shrunk by 95 percent since the 1930s.

--Norman Boucher, "Back to the Everglades," Technology Review (modified)


If possible, avoid placing a modifier between the verb and the direct object.


Weak

Inventors unlocked more than a century ago the secrets of turning the sun's rays into mechanical power.

Improved

Inventors unlocked the secrets of turning the sun's rays into mechanical power more than a century ago.

Improved

More than a century ago, inventors unlocked the secrets of turning the sun's rays into mechanical power.

--Charles Smith, "Revisiting Solar Power's Past," Technology Review


If possible, avoid splitting an infinitive with a modifier placed between to and the verb.


Weak

The ability to assemble structures at the atomic scale will require the development of molecular assemblers: tiny, programmable robots able to precisely provide positional chemical bonding.

Improved

The ability to assemble structures at the atomic scale will require the development of molecular assemblers: tiny, programmable robots able to provide precise positional chemical bonding.

--Kai Wu, "Prometheus Returns" SciTech Magazine


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## Interrupted Sentence Structure ##
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