How to tell the world you are a geek, you ask? Use the universal Geek code. By joining the geek organization, you have license to use this special code that will allow you to let other un-closeted geeks know who you are in a simple, codified statement.
The single best way to announce your geekhood is to add your geek code to signature file and announce it far and wide. But be careful, you may give other geeks the courage to come out of the closet. You might want to hang on to your copy of the code in order to help them along.
Some of the qualifiers will very probably not match with you exactly. Simply choose that qualifier that MOST CLOSELY matches you. Also, some activities described in a specific qualifier you may not engage in, while you do engage in others. Each description of each qualifier describes the wide range of activities that apply, so as long as you match with one, you can probably use that qualifier.
@ for variable, said trait is not very rigid, may change with
time or with individual interaction. For example, Geeks
who happen to very much enjoy Star Trek: The Next
Generation, but dislike the old 60's series might list
themselves as t++@.
() for indicating "cross-overs" or ranges. Geeks who go from
c+ to c--- depending on the situation (i.e. mostly "c+")
could use c+(---). Another example might be an m++(*).
This would be a person who mostly listens to classical
music, but also has an extensive collection of other types
of works.
@ is different from () in that () has finite limits within the
category, while @ ranges all over.
GB -- Geek of Business
GCS -- Geek of Computer Science
GE -- Geek of Engineering
GM -- Geek of Math
GMU -- Geek of Music
GS -- Geek of Science (Physics, Chemistry, Biology, etc.)
GSS -- Geek of Social Science (Psychology, Sociology, etc.)
GT -- Geek of Theater
GO -- Geek of Other. Some types of geeks deviate from the
normal geek activities. This is encouraged as true geeks
come from all walks of life.
GU -- Geek of 'Undecided'. This is a popular vocation with
new freshmen.
GAT -- Geek of All Trades. For those geeks that can do
anything and everything. GAT usually precludes the use
of other vocational descriptors.
d I dress a lot like those in Walmart ads
d+ I tend to wear trendy political messages like "Save the
Whales" or "Free South Africa".
d++ I tend to wear conservative dress such as a business
suit.
d- I tend to wear trendy political messages like "Nuke the
Humans", "Question Authority", or "Big Brother's Watching".
d-- I wear jeans to work just to piss off my boss
d--- At work, I have holes in my jeans and/or obscenities on
my shirt.
d? I have no idea what I am wearing right now, let alone
what I wore yesterday.
!d No clothing. Quite a fashion statement, don't you think?
-d+ I wear the same clothes all the time, no matter the
occasion, often forgetting to do laundry between wearings.
p Politics? I've heard of that somewhere but in all honesty
I really don't give a shit.
p+ Let's get the government off of big-business's back
p++ All in favor of eliminating free speech, say aye!
p+++ Fuckin' Minorities! Adolf Hitler is my hero!
p- Bring back the 60's
p-- I'm still living in the 60's
p--- No taxes through no government
-p+ Don't label me you moron! Both sides are equally fucked up!
c Computers are a tool, nothing more. I use it when it serves
my purpose.
c+ Computers are fun and I enjoy using them. I play a mean
game of Wing Commander and can use a word processor without
resorting to the manual too often. I know that a 3.5" disk
is not a hard disk. I also know that when it says 'press any
key to continue', I don't have to look for a key labeled 'ANY'.
c++ Computers are a large part of my existence. When I get up
in the morning, the first thing I do is log myself in. I mud
on weekends, but still manage to stay off of academic
probation.
c+++ You mean there is life outside of Internet? You're shittin'
me! I live for muds. I haven't dragged myself to class in
weeks.
c++++ I'll be first in line to get the new cybernetic interface
installed into my skull.
c- Anything more complicated than my calculator and I'm
screwed.
c-- Where's the on switch?
c--- If you even mention computers, I will rip your head off!
l I know what Linux is, but that's about all
l+ I've managed to get Linux installed and even used it a few
times. It seems like it is just another OS.
l++ I use Linux almost exclusively on my system. I monitor
comp.os.linux and even answer questions some times. I've
aliased Linux FTP sites to make getting new software easier.
l+++ I am a Linux wizard. I munch C code for breakfast and have
enough room left over for a kernel debugging. I have so
many patches installed that I lost track about ten versions
ago. Linux newbies consider me a net.god.
l- I have no desire to use Linux and frankly don't give a rats
ass about it.
l-- Unix sucks. Because Linux = Unix. Linux Sucks. I worship
Bill Gates.
!l I don't even use an 80x86 chip, so linux isn't really a
reality for me. (ie, Mac people).
l? What the hell is Linux? I've never even heard of it.
u I have a unix account to do my stuff in
u+ I not only have a unix account, but I slam VMS any chance I
get.
u++ I've get the entire admin ticked off at me because I am
always using all of the CPU time and trying to run programs
that I don't have access to. I'm going to try cracking
/etc/passwd next week, just don't tell anyone.
u- I have a VMS account.
u-- I've seen unix and didn't like it. DEC rules!
u--- Unix geeks are actually nerds in disguise.
e K-12, been on a college campus.
e+ Started a B.S./B.A, plan to finish it some day.
e++ Had not learned enough to know better not to go back and try
for a master's degree.
e+++ Still pretty stupid, over qualified to work any job, went and
got my Ph.D.
e- Got my bachelors, escaped alive, and am making hoards of money
writing unmaintainable (except by me) software.
e-- The company I work for was dumb enough to fund my way through
a masters degree, then started paying me even more money.
e--- Achieved a Ph.D, have devoted my life to insignificant
research, which my employer pays dearly for.
e* I learned everything there is to know about life from the
"Hitchhiker's Trilogy".
m I occasionally listen to the radio
m+ I own a tape or CD collection (records also count, but you
would be admitting how old you really are).
m++ I consider myself refined and enjoy classical and new-age
selections
m+++ I consider myself over-refined and grok that heavy-duty
elevator music.
m- Just play it loud
m-- I play air-guitar better than anyone else.
m--- LISTEN! I SAID TO PLAY IT LOUD!
m* I am an expert on so many types of music that I can't even
keep them straight
s I'm an average geek
s+/+ I'm a little taller/rounder than most.
s++/++ I'm a basketball/linebacker candidate.
s+++/+++ I usually have to duck through doors/I take up three movie
]seats.
s-/- I look up to most people. Everyone tells me to gain a
few pounds.
s--/-- I look up to damn near everybody. I tend to have to fight
against a strong breeze.
s---/--- I take a phone book with me when I go out so I can see to
eat dinner. My bones are poking through my skin.
!n Eh what? never mind the menu, give me something to eat!
n+ I like food - especially when it is healthy.
n++ I like the fibers in food
n- Food? I just grab something from the shelves with meat in it.
n-- I eat only the cheap things - even with artificial meat and
vegetables.
n--- I _live_ on snacks and coke.
h Friends come over to visit every once in a while to talk
about Geek things. There is a place for them to sit.
h+ Living alone, get out once a week to buy food, no more than
once a month to do laundry. All surfaces covered.
h++ Living in a cave with 47 computers and an Internet feed,
located near a Dominoes pizza. See !d.
h- Living with one or more registered Geeks.
h-- Living with one or more people who know nothing about being a
Geek and refuse to watch 'Star Trek'.
h--- Married, with the potential for children. (persons living
with a fiance might as well label themselves h---, you're as
good as there already.)
h* I'm not sure where I live anymore. This lab/workplace seems
like home to me.
f Yeah, I have friends. Who told you?
f+ I have quite a few really close friends. We get along great.
They are all other geeks, though.
f++ I have so many friends, I make other people jealous.
f- I have a few friends. They barely seem to speak to me anymore.
f-- I've got about one friend left in the world, who probably
wants to shoot me.
f? I *think* I have friends.
f* Everyone is my friend.
!f I have no friends. Get lost.
!g I have no glasses
g+ I've got four eyes, what's your point?
g++ I've got four eyes and tape in the middle
g+++ I have coke-bottle classes that I can use to start leaves on
fire in the hot sun.
g- I have contacts
g-- I have colored contacts
g--- I have those funky contact that have interesting designs on
them such as happy faces or some such.
w I am not weird. I'm perfectly normal.
w+ so? what's your problem with weird.
w++ I am so weird, I make Al Yankovic look sane.
w+++ Mainstream? I heard of that once, I think.
w- I'm more normal that most people normally are.
w-- Isn't everyone in the p+ group?
t It's just another TV show
t+ It's a damn fine TV show and is one of the only things
good on television any more.
t++ It's the best show around. I have all the episodes and the
movies on tape and can quote entire scenes verbatim. I've
built a few of the model kits too. But you'll never catch me
at one of those conventions. Those people are kooks.
t+++ It's not just a TV show, its a religion. I know all about
warp field dynamics and the principles behind the
transporter. I have memorized the TECH manual. I speak
Klingon. I go to cons with Vulcan ears on. I have no life.
t- Maybe it is just me, but I have no idea what the big deal
with Star Trek is. Perhaps I'm missing something but I just
think it is bad drama.
t-- Star Trek is just another Space Opera. William Shatner isn't
an actor, he's a poser! And what's with this Jean-Luc Picard?
A Frenchman with a British accent? Come on. I'd only watch
this show if my remote control broke.
t--- Star Trek SUCKS! It is the worst crap I have ever seen!
Hey, all you trekkies out there, GET A LIFE! (William
Shatner is a t---)
r Role-Playing? That's just something to do to kill a
Saturday afternoon
r+ I've got my weekly sessions set up and a character that I
know better than I know myself.
r++ There is no life outside the role of the die. I know all of
piddly rules of (chosen game). _MY_ own warped rules scare
the rest of the players.
r+++ I worship E. Gary Gygax.
r- Gosh, what an utter waste of time!
r-- Role-Players worship SATAN!
This code also is used to denote the gender of the geek. Females use 'x' in this category, while males use 'y'. For example:
x+ A female who has had sex
y+ A male who has had sex.
For those person who do not wish to give out any details of their sex life,
the use of x? (where x is the gender code) will allow you to so.
!x Sex? What's that? I've had no sexual experiences.
x+ I've had real, live sex.
x++ I was once referred to as 'easy'. I have no idea where that
might have come from though.
x- I prefer computer sex to real sex.
x-- I was once referred to as a 'cyberslut', but I have no idea
where that might have come from.
x* I'm a pervert.
x** I've been known to make perverts look like angels.
x? It's none of your business what my sex life is like (this
is used to denote your gender only).