JOKE PAGE

Elephant Jokes

How do you know when there is an elephant in your bed?
You can smell the peanuts on his breath.

How do you know when there's an elephant in your refrigerator?
You can't close the door.

How do you know when you've passed an elephant?
You can't close the toilet seat.

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming?
Here come the elephants.

What did Tarzan say when he saw the prunes coming?
Here come the elephants. (He was color-blind.)

Why did the elephant wear red tennis shoes?
So he could hide in the strawberry patch.

Why did the elephant wear blue tennis shoes?
His red ones were in the laundry.

How do you make an elephant float?
A glass of root beer, a scoop of ice cream and an elephant.

Blonde Jokes

How can you tell if a blonde's been using the computer?
There's white-out on the screen.

How can you tell if another blonde's been using the computer?
There's writing on the white-out.

Why is it good to have a blonde passenger?
You can park in the handicap zone.

Why should blondes not be given coffee breaks?
It takes too long to retrain them.

What do you call 50 blondes standing side by side?
A wind tunnel.

Why don't blondes double recipes?
The oven doesn't go to 700 degrees.

Why do men like blonde jokes?
Because they can understand them.