Article: 6827 of alt.censorship
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From: cmfaltz@phoenix.Princeton.EDU (Christine Marie Faltz)
Newsgroups: soc.men,soc.women,alt.censorship,talk.politics.misc
Subject: Re: Hate speech okay, Supreme Court says
Summary: Christine Faltz does not go for spit
Keywords: Mr. Nilges, savior complexes, whining
Message-ID: <1992Jul10.000039.12331@Princeton.EDU>
Date: 10 Jul 92 00:00:39 GMT
References: <davecb.709911990@yorku.ca> <1992Jun30.190314.3337@leland.Stanford.EDU> <1992Jun30.202409.3691@Princeton.EDU>
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In article <1992Jun30.202409.3691@Princeton.EDU> egnilges@phoenix.Princeton.EDU (Ed Nilges) writes:
>Let's take stock.

Let's take stock of what's really at stake: patronizing liberals
fighting others' fights.  It's Mr. Nilges' right, but it's ultimately
pathetic -- should I as a woman be grateful for the marytrdom of his
saliva-splattered car?


"Oppressed people must realize power within" by Christine Faltz

[Note: This was orginally published in early May in the _Daily
Princetonian_. Text within double brackets was edited out by the _Prince_]

     This is for those who blame their anger and victimhood on other people
and other groups.  I'm not going to spend my time justifying my status as a
_bona fide_ victim of a bigoted society, because I do not believe that it is a
valid means of showing that one has a right to speak.  A person's voice is not
more important simply because he or she has received hell from this society.
Voices are not moral prizes for having endured a certain amount of oppression,
but instead derive from experience, knowledge, and self-worth.  Oppression can
set the stage for achieving these things, but it is neither necessary nor
always sufficient.  And, in any case, oppression is often hidden, so judgments
based on its apparent existence or nonexistence will often be unjust.

     I know from personal experience that it takes a lot of determination,
spiritual stamina, and self-confidence to make it in our racist, sexist, and
homophobic society.  Every one of us suffers from some sort of bigotry, and
every one of us, sometimes and perhaps all of the time, fears that the
violence ravaging our society might place us among its victims.  A person so
victimized, whether they are raped, robbed, mugged, or stabbed, has the
absolute right to believe, as part of their healing process, that their
particular type of victimhood is the worst type of violence extant in this
society.  But to generalize to classes, and to blame, indiscriminately and
unreservedly, all people with some ascribed characteristic for the behavior of
one of them, is wrong.

     Is it right, because a substantial portion of black men are in our
prisons, to assume that black men are criminals?  No.  But, apparently, it is
legitimate to discriminate against a straight white male -- or, it seems, any
male -- because he has the anatomy to commit penile rape?  I am a potential
criminal; we all are.  For six years, I spent an extraordinary amount of time
trying to figure out why people from all backgrounds and races, with diverse
ideologies, treat people with disabilities as outcasts or objects of pity.  I
cannot describe how frequently I suppressed my violent reactions to the anger
I faced, the rejections, misunderstanding and, sometimes, outright cruelty
that will most likely continue to dog me for the rest of my life, no matter
how successful I become.  Men and women; straights and gays; Jew and
Christians; blacks and whites: all kinds have denied me employment, asked
absurd questions about my ability to care for my myself, and refused me the
right to prove myself.  From elementary school through high school, both girls
and boys threw lighted matches at me, spat in my food and then denied it,
threw garbage in my lunchbox, attempted to beat me up, terrorized my younger
brother because he had a blind sister, kicked dirt in my face on the
playground, [[held me against a wall and spit gum into my mouth,]] and a host
of other unnecessary cruel violations, every school day for six or seven
years.  Boys and girls were both responsible.  [[Men and women,]] mothers and
fathers, wanted me out of the school.  Every group or class fears or hates the
disabled; in short, everyone, no matter how often they have been treated to
bigotry themselves, has some prejudices they need to confront.

     But I don't have a claim on others' lives just because they have made me
angry.  I don't have a right to assume that just because someone is male or
sighted that their motives are insincere when they want to join me in fighting
the powers that be.  You see, there is no such thing as "reverse
discrimination" or "reverse sexism".  It may be a "crude awakening" for some,
but those who claim to be "self-reliant" had better arrive at the
understanding that exclusion of anyone from a public meeting, or dismissal of
a person's or group's voice, for any amount of time, is silencing and not
"reverse silencing."  [[It involves closing the lines of communication, a
technique more characteristic of those who "feel the ground shaking under
their feet" than those who profess "self-reliance."]]  Self-reliance has
nothing to do with the power or right to exclude; it has everything to do with
not allowing anyone or any group, no matter who they are or where you are, to
silence you.  No one can silence me. No one.  If they don't like what I say,
they can leave.  If I don't like what they have to say, I have that choice as
well.  Both of us, however, should have the right to stay, and attempt to
arrive at a mutual understanding, if that is our desire.  Self-reliance is
confidence without the need for exclusion or "reverse" discrimination.

     Just as my anger does not give me a claim on others' lives, others' anger
does not give them a claim upon mine.  I recognize that when I was younger, I
often contributed to the myths surrounding blindness by accepting unnecessary
"accommodations" provided for the disabled.  This realization taught me a
powerful lesson.  Women contribute to the evils of society just as often as
men.  (Who _raises_ all of these sexist boys and girls?) Blacks contribute to
the evils of society as often as whites.  How dare the looters in Los Angeles
ask me to accept the guilt for the slave holders of the past and the racists
of today?  I have no time and no inclination to feel guilty.  The Rodney King
verdict was, and is, utterly disgusting. But so too is anger which lets itself
loose unchecked, destroying anyone in its path.  But the rhetoric which
accompanies that violence is eerily familiar: "you're a collaborator",
[["you're not really a black/woman--you're stronger than most",]] "we are
innocent because they are guilty."

     I happen to be stronger than most women.  I'm stronger than most men too,
what's your point?  Where do you think my strength came from?  Most strong
people are not born that way.  Despite the fact that the vast majority of
people doubt my abilities because I cannot see, I persist.  It doesn't matter
what anyone else thinks -- not most of the time, anyways.  But everyone
experiences moments of doubt, failure, and frustration, even white men.  We
condone riots with pithy assertions of "no justice, no peace" yet would deny a
person who grew up in a dysfunctional, probably abusive family, now
unemployed, a right to anger because he happened to be white and male.

     I do not care what you say: determination and true self-love and
self-reliance do work, even without changing the oppressive nature of
"society". I had sixty interviews a few summers ago and was not hired.  This
will very likely happen again, despite the fact that I was overqualified for
most jobs and ready, willing, and able to be challenged by others.  I have had
my "crude awakenings" of the world of working women and men.  I have had every
rude awakening you can imagine, from every type of person.  I still refuse to
say that the world must change before I can take an equal part in it.  It is
much easier, and more effective, to change yourself than to change the world.
Your life is the only one which you have the right to mold, control, or
manipulate.  [[Your voice is the only one you have the right to remove, if you
so choose.  But I will not be ignored simply because you do not like my
voice.  I may not like yours, but you have the right to talk back.  I cannot
take that power away from you, and if you allow someone to do so, you must
share the responsibility for that silence.]]  I have come to terms with the
fact that when I was younger, I contributed to myths of blindness by leaving
class five minutes early "to avoid the rush in the halls."  I have used my
disability to avoid getting into trouble, and at the time, I felt I had the
right to get into trouble because I was hurting and nobody else seemed to be.
I was wrong.  We all, homophobes, racists, and generally tolerant people
alike, are violated, hurt, or angry at some point in our lives.  We all have
feelings and vulnerabilities.  But we must not forget amongst all of our anger
that we have the power to take control of our lives.  I will not be told that
I am "playing into the system" because I stick up for the rights of white men
as well as black men.  I will not be told I must share in the guilt of this
cruel society simply because I am told I should.  I am tired of hearing the
words "I don't want to take your voice away" and "I am not assigning blame"
from people who wish to do just that and are assigning blame incessantly.

     I want to be at the top, and I am going to be.  You can work with me, or
you can be angry and sulk away the years, assigning blame, declaring and
hiding behind your right to be angry.  You have the right to be whatever you
choose -- so take it.  I am not responsible for your pain or anger, and I will
not accept the guilt for things I have not perpetuated against you.  I do not
have to help you change the world to your vision of it if I do not want to; my
world-view does not have to become yours for us to treat each other and others
with dignity and respect -- at least until they prove they are unworthy of
such respect.  I have to work harder to attain my goals because of the unjust
power dynamics in this society; that is true.  But I am going to attain those
goals, despite them.  Watch me.

-- 
516-223-5244, 609-921-0962 (c) 1992, Christine Faltz